FUQ Forwards™

1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unf— you.
2. You say I’m a hard-ass like it’s a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of deodorant.
4. Well, aren’t we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don’t bother me, I’m living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn’t an office. It’s hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don’t you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?
11. I’m not crazy. I’ve been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.
15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t gone to sleep yet.
16. Back off!! You’re standing in my aura.
17. Don’t worry. I forgot your name too.
18. I work 65 hours a week to be this poor.
19. Not all managers are annoying. Some are dead.
20. Wait…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
21. Chaos, panic and disorder. Your work here is done.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like shit. Is that the style now?
24. Earth is full. Go home.
25. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty-bitty ego?
26. I’m not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth.
28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
29. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
30. Look in my eyes … Do you see one ounce of gives-a-shit?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 16th, 2009 at 11:27 am and is filed under Forwarded. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.