He became a super callused fragile mystic with extensive halitosis.

Why did the Zen Buddhist decline pain killers for his cavity?

He chose to transcend dental medication.

What did the Zen Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?

Make me one with everything.

What was the hot dog vendor’s reply when the Zen Buddhist asked for the money left from the $10 bill he gave him?

Change comes from within!

Finally, if a Zen Buddhist becomes totally involved with working on a computer, does he enter Nerdvana?

Which reminds me of this classic from

“God Almighty!” shouted Janice and the teacher said, “Very good” and Janice fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked Janice, “Who is our Lord and Saviour.” But, Janice didn’t even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.

“Jesus Christ!” shouted Janice and the teacher said, “Very good,” and Janice fell back asleep.

Then the teacher asked Janice a third question. “What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?” and again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.

This time Janice jumped up and shouted, “If you stick me with that thing one more time, I’ll break it in half and stick it up your ass!”

… the teacher fainted!

So, unless you want me to start making up my own jokes and posting them, you had better send me some more at fuqfwd@fywservices.com.

And which Warren Street do you want? We have three plus three Warren Avenues, three Warren Squares, a Warren Park, and a Warren Place.

Pay no attention to the street names. There’s no school on School Street, no court on Court street, no dock on Dock Square, no water on Water Street. Back Bay streets are in alphabetical odda. Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth. So are South Boston streets: A, B, C, D.

If the streets are named after trees (Walnut,Chestnut,Cedar,)you’re on Beacon Hill.

If they’re named after poets, you’re in Wellesley.

Dot is Dorchester, Rozzie is Roslindale, JP is Jamaica Plain. Readville doesn’t exist.

The North-East-South-West thing: Southie is South Boston. The South End is the South End. The North End is east of the West End. The West End is no more. A guy named Rappaport got rid of it one night. Eastie is East Boston. The East End is Boston Harbor.

There are two State Houses, two City Halls, two courthouses, two Hancock buildings.

There’s also a Boston Latin School and a Boston Latin Academy. How should we know which one you mean?

Route 128 is also I-95. It is also I-93.

The Harvard Bridge goes to MIT. It’s measured in ‘smoots.’

The subway doesn’t run all night. This isn’t Noo Yawk.